Wholly Controlling the Soul

This is a solo thing
The crowd bays for blood
Chanting my name, bones ache, hands clap.
Standing alone.
Feet apart
A silence rips through the noise.
They are still; eyes glinting.
Licking lips, cracking fingers
The spotlight; no time to hide
Nakedly pleading- shreds of mercy.
They can smell the fear
Thousands of thoughts turn to your veins
And the life within them- soon to be the lack
As they suck and bleed you dry
Throw you out the window
Your empty corpse another paper bag
On the ever changing winds of success.

Lonely Hearts Play Villainous Parts In B-Movies

Whispers in the dark make ripples
Waves on a pool of invisible tears
Unseen as they're cried by the lonely
Only the mirror mage for comfort-
But the truth hurts
So it must be painful to look
Satin silence slips slowly through the night
A real bodied noise grasps faces
Loud fingers grip on brains, uninvited evil.
A chink of light through an open window
But the breeze freezes thought and lovers in their element.
Earth air fire and water
Touches exist in imaginations and the pillow smells of one
It's never the same by yourself
A smile unseen never lit a face
A laugh unheard carries on in the wind
And no-one realises who.

I'm Finger Food And You've Got An Appetite For Destruction

Walking in, you own the door
Sitting here, bite my lip and cut to shreds.
Shadows tower and consume
Hungry, jaws gape and leer,
I know what this is about,
Seduced by power, swayed by money,
But turned by violence and kept by it
Fear freezes and thaws, this is something much more
The cuts and bruises can be glossed over
But the stuff inside will never be explained
In a corner, a stairwell, a backstreet pass
I ripped apart long ago
I bled and I was sore- past tense
The pain only carries on in my head
Uncomfortably numb as you make me
Uncomfortably none.

I'm Not Going To Tell You What Happens In The End

Turn the pages of my heart
I must be so easy to read
The letters just keep flowing
Inky black tongue, dribbling rhyme
Spitting insults,
Turn me over, the blurb on my brain,
I'm dusty- lyng on this shelf,
Outdated and faded,
My arms gold leafed,
The print of my fingers left on your skin
Smile a title,
Cry an ending
Search for the lost prose,
Find the hidden meaning,
Read it and open my eyes
Close the book on lonliness
And take down a new one
It's what I've become.

Evil Wears A White Dress; Hate A Lace Veil

This is a prequel to the poem Havisham by Carol Ann Duffy


Surrounded by well-wishers. Totally alone.
A white island admist a sea of black hearts and lies
They assure me, comforting words afflict great pain
Don’t touch me please, I can’t stand this

Waiting. And hoping. Swearing and cursing
Forgive me Father, please explain why
My confusion spirals up and away
Red chasing black chasing white chasing

Me. As I run far from that dreadful place
A church full of lovely hate, how I delight
In despising him; his whispers, his promises
He holds the pieces of my heart and
Closes his hands around, clasping cruelty
Never forgiven my love, I will never forget.

Stereotypes Were Invented To Make The World Seem Less Confusing

But here's the truth:
Come a little closer
And I will whisper with my forked tongue,
And pour sulphur lies from the bottom of my black, black heart,
Sitting comfortably?
I must unravel this complicated life,
We have to escape this web of deceit,
Because the spider always has eight legs
And two faces.
One looks at what's really there,
The other blind,
Veiled lives lived undiscovered,
We can change this- voices were made to be heard
And eyes to be stared into.
Look beyond with them now and work it out.
We're clever enough to interrupt the flow,
Right now.

Skin And Blister Is Quite The Wrong Description

Wrap your arms around me,
Make everything alright,
I return all that you ever, always need.
It's a special, different, similar moment,
We'll share our love, just us; together like you asked.

Dark brown toffee waterfall,
Cascades over shoulders and back,
Big round and beautiful eyes; plead docile dear,
There's no love delicious, that you lack.

At this place and in this heart, stopped with time,
I'm still learning to love and hold onto what I do,
I know that whatever the problem- sweet nothings,
You protect me caress, delightful, from the cold.

Sentimental Or Semi-Mental?

Where is that line that I drew in the sand?
With that sharpened stick that you passed,
Into my hands and through my body.
Have I stepped over it?
Because it disappeared with you.

The waves crash and lap at my feet,
A few steps to silence,
A couple of paces to peace,
The dark cliffs leer and loom,
And I'm lost.

Little lady, I let the wind stroke me
Like you used to, oh, why not now?
Salt water stings the gashes on my face,
Eyes have become weeping sores,
Hands transformed; wrecked palaces.

I wasn't good enough for you, so
I am no help to others, no comfort to anyone else,
More salt water cascading, fill my mouth, ears, nose, eyes,
Fill my lungs,

We breathe our last.

My Mother's Mother

A powdered cheek to kiss;
And a familiar lipstick smile.
Gives love without words,
Your open, delighted face is worth one thousand.
Trivialities, trials and tribulations
Never show on the outside,
Only happiness and care
Can radiate from those deep soul eyes.
Hands to hold are gnarled with age,
But the imprint of my palm,
Forever burnt onto yours.
As I’ve grown, so has your ability,
To smile and laugh and love;
Lifelong, lived, light-hearted,
Lavender coloured and scented,
A centrepiece of the family,
A masterful masterpiece,
Delightfully delirious with
Wonderful wisdom

Photo Album

4 years ago you smiled and stared,
Under the soft Christmas lights,
Snowflakes peppered those butterfly lashes,
Stroking my cheek as we danced,
Bathed in fairy glow.

3 years ago we held hands and sighed,
As amber dewdrops glistened and sunk,
Underneath the horizon of our lives,
Stretching out into a dark infinity.

2 years ago you posed, poised and pretty,
Your laughter echoed to the stars,
No one could bury what we had,
A colour photogarph from a true life fairytale,
Was ours to keep.

This year I cut and paste
Colourful facades on grey limbs
Silver days embedded into ruby weeks
And a golden year once more.